I wanted to tell him that it was just regular vaginal discharge and that it had nothing to do with me being horny, but he interrupted me and told me it was my turn again. He removed the cloth from Alina's face and pushed it against my nose and mouth once more. The chemical fumes hit me hard a few breaths in and I was already forgetting what was happening and I had trouble controlling my body, I was slumping in his arms and he gently guided my head back onto my pillow. 'Good girl.' He said. 'Nice and docile. Nice and compliant.' I don't know if I actually passed out, the next thing I know was him tugging on my arms and legs he was undressing both me and Alina and then he tied us both down on the bed, alternating the chloroformed cloth between her and me. Whenever one of us would stir or cough or moan they would get the cloth for a while until we were subdued and quiet again, so I learned to keep still and to keep my mouth shut, although I was a bit worried that meant Alina. Asolitary tear broke free of her right eye and slid down her cheek.Helen recalled her conversation with Dr. Henry Watkins, an oncologist atthe Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center, two weeks earlier. He'd just examinedEric and she'd asked him for the prognosis."I'm sorry to say it's not good, Ms. Traynor." Just how bad is it, doctor?" she'd asked."The cancer's spread from his stomach to his pancreas, liver, kidneysand lymph nodes. The magnitude of the metastasis rules out organtransplants, even assuming we could round up all of the organs. I'mafraid there's nothing we can do."She'd choked back a sob and asked, "How long does he have?" A month. Maybe two at most."The hardest thing Helen had ever had to do was to tell Eric the badnews. But he took it like a man. He wanted to leave the hospital andreturn home. He rebuffed her suggestion to go into a hospice. "I want todie at home, Mom, in my own bed," he'd insisted.Recalling the conversation with Eric made her sob, and she dabbed at hereyes.
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